I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
my poor anus
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
