his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
