your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
this will be a night to untag.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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