Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
