I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
