It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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