She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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