I didn't shave. On purpose
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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