I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
it glows. i had to have it.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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