okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Sex in the backyard? Check.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
