she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
