fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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