He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
