If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
