yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
