Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
