there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
