so that wasnt chicken after all
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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