Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize