if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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