Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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