Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
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