it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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