Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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