he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
