she kept yelling 'call me bella'
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Randomize
