ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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