i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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