What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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