im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You can't special order awesome
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Randomize
