did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
