you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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