you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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