garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think im going to throw up on grandma
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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