I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize