Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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