oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
