PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
