I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
