She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
