he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
