Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
