why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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