He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
