All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
This house was built for laser tag.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
