hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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