Duck Duck Cougar?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I forgot how hot balto sounded
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize