sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
