so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
