It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
