you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
