I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
false alarm, still single
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
